General tiredness

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Politicians are enthralling

Commentators proclaimed the ‘high’ turnout in Thursday’s poll, but even after the shock of a hung parliament and a momentous campaign which was suspended twice because of terror outrages, it has emerged it was only the highest for a General Election since 1997 at 68.7 per cent.

The trajectory for people turning out to vote remains downwards; with this election coming two years after the last one, and a referendum, local, Welsh Assembly and Scottish Parliament elections following.

Edwin Phillips meets two weary voters (V1) and (V2) discussing a tiresome electoral process.

V1:  (Sighing)  I’m so BORED!

V2:  (Nodding) me too.

Voting is exciting

V1:  If I get another politician on my doorstep asking for my vote I am going to scream.

V2:  (Still nodding) me too.

V1:  (Becoming angry now) my Nan in Tonyrefail has had EIGHT!

V2:  Poor dab.

I’m with that Brenda Parsons from Bristol, who said after the election was called, “you’re joking – not another one!”.

(Gloomily) there’s even talk of yet ANOTHER election now the Government doesn’t have a majority and has to rely on those nutty DUP-ers.

Some of that lot reckon homosexuality is a ‘sin’ and believe in creationism.

Now Downing Street sources say it made an “error” when when it issued a statement saying the DUP had agreed the principles of a deal to back the Conservatives.

God help us – as Ian Paisley would say!

The DUP founded by Ian Paisley – are they nutty?

V1:  Mmm – I feel really sorry for those poor people in Northern Ireland.

With elections I mean.

V2:  (Sighing again) exactly.

They’ve had to elect their assembly TWICE in a bit more than a year!

It wasn’t much better for those Jocks.

They had to go to the polls three years ago to decide if they should be independent – and that was before the last General Election!

There might even be a second independence referendum.

(Quietly) although Sturgeon (leader of the SNP) is screwed on that one now.

Upholding British values of democracy can be hard

V1:  (Mumbling) it rained on Thursday, so I was even less likely to go out to a draughty church hall and vote.

All those pointy-headed academics say the same thing.

I saw one piece of research that showed the less time between votes, then the less likely people are to go the polls.

That was looking at thousands of council by-elections, too, between 1983 and 1999.

V2:  (More sighing) ah, yes, those council by-elections.

Nobody votes in those.

V1:  (Stares at sky) it’s not just us either.

In the old days elections were few and far between

Those two aides of the Maybot who orchestrated their shambolic election (Nick Timothy and Fiona Hill) only went because otherwise there would have been a leadership election announced today.

Yesterday two of the papers said Boris Johnson was being urged to run, because Theresa May is “discredited”.

But now he says he is ‘backing’ the Maybot.

One of the papers yesterday said she has three days to save her premiership, and her authority is in “freefall”.

She even had to keep Philip Hammond, thank God, who we both know she was going to sack.

The Maybot says she is “getting on with the job” after being persuaded not to resign, but that sacked Chancellor she hated (George Osborne) called her a “dead woman walking”.

What a complete and utter MESS!

‘I DON’T BELIEVE IT!’

They want us to vote more too.

Did you see on the telly they are going to have more elected mayors?

V2:  (Glumly) more politicians turning up on my doorstep then.

And my Nan’s.

I opened the door to Carwyn Jones (Welsh First Minister) the other day.

V1:  God, that must have been a shock!

They’re going to expand the number of Welsh AMs as well.

V1 and V2 look heavenward. 

On Friday Edwin Phillips hears more about the expenses-paid trips of a Welsh university official. 

Tomorrow why a Labour AM’s comments after the General Election were condemned as “tribal”.